At the ripe old age of 32 I'm finely starting to understand some things a little clearer. Mainly myself. I'm realizing some of my weaknesses and my strengths a bit more.
Realization #1- I have identified my addictive personalty and how it can be both a good and bad thing. Good as in my need to exercise daily and bad being I might decide that I want a pepperoni, cheese, and crackers every night before bed (very bad). So in identifying this I can adjust things in my life and stay away from those bad things that may be habit forming for me. Now I try to save enough calories for my nightly bowl of popcorn.
Realization #2- Like Popeye used to say. I am what I am. I am proud of the person that I have become. I have some regrets of the choices that I made when I was younger. But it was those choices that shaped me into the person that I am today. I'm not being prideful. But I do like to think that I'm a pretty decent person for the most part. I no longer beat myself up over my past choices. It's those choices that have given the opportunity to help others who might be in similar situations. I've also become content with my body image. I'm still working on loosing weight but I'm not going to stress over it anymore. This is the body that God has given me and I'm making it a priority in my life to take care of it.
Realization #3- My house does not need to perfectly clean all the time. I have 4 busy children and a busy husband. So things are never just the way that I want them anymore. But that's OK. It's just a house. If people are coming over I'm not going to scramble and run around all day trying to make it look perfect. If my friends are coming over they already know how my house is and they except that. When I go over to a friends house I'm not judging how clean their house is. I'm there to spend time with them.
Realization #4- I'm never going to be the perfect parent. I'm always going to make mistakes. I'm only human not God. I do the best that I can. If I can go to bed at night knowing that I have done my best as a parent. Then I've done my job. My kids are happy and healthy and I'm giving them the ability to make good decisions in their life. I'm raising them to be good strong Christians. These are the things that matter to me.
Realization#5- Your friends are only your friends if they except you for who you are. If they truly love me it's for things that make me who I am. I have always been a person who could walk up to a stranger and strike up a conversation. I'm a bit loud sometimes. I sometimes talk out of turn. But I love people. This is me. If you don't like those kind of things then you probably wont like me.
Realization #6- This is a big one. Everyone has their own hang ups. None of us are exempt from this. We all have something that we're not exactly proud of in our lives. Some have addictions and some have eating disorders, some may yell too much etc..... Some have bad decisions in their past and are still dealing with the consequences. Some are still making bad decisions. We all have skeletons in our closet. Things that we're not proud of. Things we wouldn't want to reveal to others. Nobody is perfect!! If we were then we wouldn't need God's forgiveness.
Now I'm sure that you older ladies are grinning from ear to ear thinking "I knew all of this years ago". And some of you younger ladies are thinking "what is she talking about?". But when I was young I thought the same way. But you just wait. One day it will all start becoming a little bit clearer to you too. I'm sure that by the time I'm 90 I'll have it all figured out. NOT!!!